In Favor of Choice
There seems to
be some misconception regarding the matter of choice in the
pro-life movement. There is a vocal element that claims
that those individuals who oppose abortion are
anti-choice.
Where we differ is not whether there is a choice to be made
or not, but when the choices are made and where the matter
of personal responsibility and logical consequences should
be faced. Let me see if I can't shed a little light on the
matter.
Example
#1: My unmarried
daughter is on an outing with a young man who feels that
sex outside of marriage is acceptable. She faces a number
of choices.
• If she knew
his views about sex prior to the outing, she made the
decision to go with him anyway.
• She must decide whether to continue the date or make an
excuse and leave and go home.
• She must decide whether to be alone with
him
or remain with a crowd.
• She must decide whether or not sex outside of marriage is
acceptable for her.
• She must decide whether or not she wants to have sex with
him.
• She must decide whether or not to have sex with him.
• She must decide whether or not to prevent conception if
she decides to have sex.
• She must decide whether or not to continue to have a
relationship with him after the encounter.
• If she becomes pregnant, she must decide what she will do
about the baby.
• She must decide whether to involve her parents, the young
man, and any other significant support people in the
decision or make it on her own.
There were at
least eight identifiable choices before she had to decide
the fate of an unborn child. With each and every choice she
made, she set into a motion a specific set of possible
consequences for her behavior. If she believes that sex
outside of marriage is wrong and abides by that principle,
abortion never becomes an issue in this scenario.
Example
#2: A young woman is
involved in a sexual relationship outside of marriage. She
and the young man discover that she is pregnant.
• Initially,
they had to decide to have an ongoing relationship without
benefit of marriage.
• They had to decide whether or not to prevent conception.
• Once the pregnancy is confirmed, they must decide how
they feel about the pregnancy and their relationship.
• If he is not supportive of the pregnancy, she must
determine whether to stay or leave the relationship.
• If he pressures her to have an abortion, she must
determine whether to choose him over their baby.
• If he threatens to abandon her or throw her out if she
doesn't have an abortion, she must decide what other
options she has if she chooses not to abort.
• If she chooses to carry the child to term, she must
decide whether to parent or place it for adoption.
• If she decides to parent, she must decide if he will have
any involvement in the child.
• He must decide whether he wants contact with the child,
and he may not have a choice as to whether to provide
financial support for the child.
In this
scenario, there are multiple choices prior to deciding the
fate of the child. In only the last item is there a point
where anyone besides the baby could be made to do
something. Many young women in this situation, however,
feel they have no choices. Many young women say they
obtained an abortion because
they had NO choice in the matter.
And many abortuaries foster the illusion of no choice by
not counseling these women on other choices they may have.
These may include a place to stay if they are evicted,
assistance with medical and financial help, and emotional
support for parenting or adoption.
Example
#3: A young woman is
sexually assaulted or the victim of an incestuous
relationship. She, too, has a number of choices.
• She must
decide whether or not to go directly for medical assistance
to help prevent conception IF she is at the midpoint of her
cycle and fertile.
• She must decide whether to prosecute her attacker.
• If she becomes pregnant, statistically a rarity, she must
decide whether or not to continue the pregnancy.
• If she decides to abort the child, she must decide if she
can live with the guilt and consequences of an abortion
added on top of the sexual assault.
• If she decides to continue the pregnancy, she must decide
whether to parent or place it for adoption.
Granted, the
list is shorter, but the choices are still there.
Example
#4: A young woman
discovers she is pregnant with a child she set out to
conceive. She gets appropriate prenatal care in the early
stages of pregnancy. Her doctor suggests she have a
specific test which looks for genetic conditions in the
child.
• She must
decide whether to have the test or not and whether the
risks to the baby are acceptable.
• She must decide if she can live with the uncertainty
waiting on possible multiple test results.
• If the test comes back positive, she must decide whether
to have a second test to confirm the results.
• If the second test is positive, she may need to determine
whether to have a third test for final confirmation.
• If she determines that the child has a genetic condition,
she must choose to continue the pregnancy or abort.
• If the condition is not compatible with life, she may
have to decide whether to abort the child or continue the
pregnancy for as long as the child is able to sustain life.
• If the defect is surgically repairable, she must decide
whether to risk surgery in utero or post-partum.
• If she decides to continue the pregnancy, she must choose
whether to parent or place it for adoption.
• If she decides to abort and the child was normal, she
must determine how to live with her actions.
• If she decides to parent, she must decide how she will
adapt her life to meet the needs of the child.
Here again, many
choices are open prior to the choice to abort the baby.
It would be foolish to assume that the only choice in each
of these four examples is the choice to abort or continue a
pregnancy. It would be equally foolish to deny that people
who believe that life begins at conception and that
abortion is murder are antichoice. They would point to the
many places along the path where choices were made that led
to the ultimate choice of abortion.
So, we come to the real differences:
• What is the
standard by which choices should be weighed? The Bible?
Feelings? Raging hormones? Circumstances? Family values
learned in childhood? Something else?
• At what point does a woman's right to choose end, and a
baby's rights begin? Conception? Birth? Convenience?
Infancy? Childhood? If that child is female, shouldn't
a woman's
right to choose include her
rights too?
• Should a woman and a man consider pregnancy outside of
marriage (or inside of marriage where a baby is unwanted) a
logical consequence of that relationship and accept the
responsibility to choose life-giving options? Should it
carry the same weight as the consequences of an illegal
offense (do the crime, do the time) or bad choice in
judgment?
• Should we teach children that they are simply animals
that must give in to their raging hormones, or should we
encourage them to accept responsibility for their actions,
practice self-control, and affirm their right to choose to
remain celibate outside of marriage?
• Should we support the individual who chooses to abstain
from sex outside of marriage by honoring her or him, or
continue to socially stigmatize them with labels like:
frigid, old-fashioned, odd, "not normal", etc.
• Should we continue to focus only the choice between
abortion and life, or help individuals learn to consider
the consequences of their actions
before a pregnancy
occurs.
The Bible says
there is one standard by which we govern life's decision.
The Bible says that sex outside of marriage is wrong. The
Bible calls the marriage bed honorable and encourages
sexual purity inside marriage and outside of marriage. The
Bible calls abortion is murder. The Bible acknowledges life
begins at conception. The Bible says that God opens and
closes the womb; sends and ends life. The Bible calls
children a blessing and the fruit of the womb His reward.
Even God acknowledges that we have the right to choose.
Adam and Even chose to disobey God in the Garden and reaped
the consequences of their sin. Each and every one of us is
faced with chooses every day. Several time in the Bible,
God admonishes us to choose life. In numerous places, God
is specific about the choices we face on a variety of
issues, the consequences of each choice, and which options
are morally right or wrong. The Bible spells out the
ultimate consequences for a life lived far from the
plumline of God's moral law.
I'm not anti-choice. I simply feel one should make the
right choices at the right time, for the right reasons, and
accept the consequences whether positive or negative.
As a Christian, a minister of the Gospel, and an
individual, I am in favor of the right to choose. As a
birth professional, I choose life (birth) over death
(abortion). As a parent, I pray that my children make the
right decisions and work to provide them with a definitive
standard of moral right and wrong. As a loving parent, I
will choose to love my children even when they make wrong
choices. As a sinner saved by grace, I will forgive others
and not seek to play God by judging them. However, I will
not fail to hold up the standard of biblical morality and
affirm that what God calls "sin" is sin.
Contact
Information:
Kathy
Barr, CCD, CCCE, CCM, BE, PE, CVE, Traditional Naturopath
817-819-8457
©1999
Titus 2 Birthing: A Return to the Biblical
Model
